EDN

I'm pretty introverted. I'm okay with going through my workday and not talking to anyone. I'm bad at small talk anyways. I work in such a large environment and come in contact with so many people yet I just mind my own business. Sometimes I get a hello, most of the time they smile and I'll smile back.

Why is it I avoid contact? Is it this fear of stepping out of my comfort zone? I need to step out and force myself to be more friendly. Why? I ask myself why all the time. Is it somehow going to benefit me? Maybe, maybe not. I just need to do it. I need to smile more, say hello more, maybe even make small talk more. There's no reason not to, and it won't hurt me so why am I not doing it?

I would be selfish to weigh the benefits of socializing or not. If someone takes time out of their day to speak with me why should I not return the favor? The funny thing is I love to talk. Once I get going it's hard to shut me up. So why is it I hate doing what I love?

The introvert thing is true. Sometimes I just like being alone. I hate small talk mainly because it's so fake, there is no depth behind those conversations. Although it doesn't hurt to have small talk here and there. Asking how someone's weekend was or what they had for dinner is the reason behind my problem. I seek a deeper more meaningful conversation, so I guess that's why I prefer not to talk most of the time.

But at the same time I think of all the missed opportunities/interactions I have had since I refused to talk. Everyone is seeking approval, and so that itself should make conversations less daunting. Because everyone wants to be loved, and chances are they won't bite. So here's to changing things. Stepping outside the box, and having a good time.

Mo Cushla

It's finally 2014. Day 2 of us ringing in the new year. And I keep on seeing posts on Facebook and Instagram about making this year better then the last. I don't disagree but I don't think it's fair to measure personal improvement based on what year it is. Personal improvement should be a constant process. The day I told myself I can be a better person I began to do things differently. Small thing here, small thing there, culminating into me improving as a human being. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't agree with judging what I've done based on time. I believe the only time you should measure is how much time left you have left on this earth to make a difference.

Umph

People foreign and of whom speak with accents in English give it the extra umph.

I have come to realize that when you want added.. how do I put this.. dramatic effect. When you want something to be deeper and more emotional, you get someone with an accent to say it. Now I'm not saying a straight up Fob will make me quiver. I'm saying people who have mastered the English language, yet still speak with an accent just makes it that much more better. Better!!! Am I crazy to think the best way to speak English is to have a non English native speak it?! Case in point, example #1:

Boom Ken Watanabe makes shit sound so dramatic. I would take him more seriously then Tom Cruise that's for sure.

Now for example #2:
Fucking Javier Bardem.. now isn't that some Evil ass shit? There has to be a reason every single villian in James Bond has never been an American... yet all speak English?! Cause foreigners make the English language sound so much better.

Just a random thought I just wanted to share. I know it's random but damn.. it's true.

One hat = Many meanings

So when an Asian guy wears a trucker hat it all comes down to what ethnicity they are. If a Chinese or Taiwanese guy does it it's because they fobby. Wanna get that fob style down.

When a Korean guy wears a trucker hat they just want to be flashy. And will probably accompany that with an Ed hardy tshirt.

When a viet guy wears the trucker hat they just.. Being normal and want to look douchey. Nothing to it. But thing about it 3 ethnicities wearing the same thing but portraying a different image. Amazing. I will have to go with my roots and Ed hardy my wardrobe up.

Things That Annoy Me

I might add to this later, but here are a few things that annoy me:

1. When you're shopping online, and you click to enlarge the product image.. and the picture that pops out is the same size as the picture before.

2. When you see a random girl's name on Facebook that sounds cute, so you click on her profile picture to quench your stalking thirst, cept in literally every single picture that ho has up there's like 15 girls in them so you can't figure out which one she is. It's called FACEbook..... bitch.

3. Dane Cook

occasionally, i like to write poetry

//bullies
ever step in the shoes of those you step on?
felt a poke to the chest where your heart rests on?
perhaps a depression is left when the pressure kept on
or did you lift your leg and just pressed on

//bread
some kneed it, some make it
some eat it, some take it

A Weird Confession

Every night before I sleep I always have the need to be doing something. So I develop little habits. Here are the two habits I currently have before I sleep, and please don't laugh.

1. Watch Friends - Even though I have seen every single episode.. twenty times I need to watch at least one episode before I can turn the lights off and attempt to sleep.

2. Instagram - Starting anywhere between 8-10pm everyday I shun instagram like Sarah Palin shuns intelligence. This is so a good amount of interesting pictures posted builds up and I have a bunch to look at when it's time to sleep. Looking at instagram is the last thing I do before I close the eyes.

Well there you have it, my sleeping ritual before going to bed.