EDN

I'm pretty introverted. I'm okay with going through my workday and not talking to anyone. I'm bad at small talk anyways. I work in such a large environment and come in contact with so many people yet I just mind my own business. Sometimes I get a hello, most of the time they smile and I'll smile back.

Why is it I avoid contact? Is it this fear of stepping out of my comfort zone? I need to step out and force myself to be more friendly. Why? I ask myself why all the time. Is it somehow going to benefit me? Maybe, maybe not. I just need to do it. I need to smile more, say hello more, maybe even make small talk more. There's no reason not to, and it won't hurt me so why am I not doing it?

I would be selfish to weigh the benefits of socializing or not. If someone takes time out of their day to speak with me why should I not return the favor? The funny thing is I love to talk. Once I get going it's hard to shut me up. So why is it I hate doing what I love?

The introvert thing is true. Sometimes I just like being alone. I hate small talk mainly because it's so fake, there is no depth behind those conversations. Although it doesn't hurt to have small talk here and there. Asking how someone's weekend was or what they had for dinner is the reason behind my problem. I seek a deeper more meaningful conversation, so I guess that's why I prefer not to talk most of the time.

But at the same time I think of all the missed opportunities/interactions I have had since I refused to talk. Everyone is seeking approval, and so that itself should make conversations less daunting. Because everyone wants to be loved, and chances are they won't bite. So here's to changing things. Stepping outside the box, and having a good time.